5 Reasons Why

5 Reasons Why

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5 Reasons Why to Get Sober

Let’s do something fun today!

I love this exercise. It is good to do to remind yourself of how far you’ve come and a great exercise when the cravings and temptations become unreal.

Let’s list 5 things that you thought you’d miss, the things you feel you had to “sacrifice” (or let’s use the word limit) because of your lifestyle change AND then list 5 things you have to gain (or maybe have already gained!) from this getting sober! I bet we’ll all see how much more we have to gain than what we’ve given up 🙂 Excited to see these!

1 • I was afraid I’d be no fun & be boring
2 • I was afraid I’d lose my friends
3 • I was afraid I’d have no social life
4 • I was afraid I’d lose my identity
5 • I was afraid people would make fun of me

Turns out that I didn’t know how to have fun without alcohol, but I’ve spent the past 700 days trying new things, stepping outside of my comfort zone and doing things the old drunk-Mindy would have never considered doing. I am far from boring. Looking back, doing the same thing [getting smashed every weekend] over and over was the definition of boring. I lost people in my life and my social life changed, but it just reinforced who was my real friend who truly cared if I got better and supported me. I did lose part of my identity, but I didn’t lose who I was, I just lost a “security blanket” which caused me to work hard to find my self and learn who I was, which I like a whole lot better than party-girl-Mindy. Only one person has made fun of me to my face and called me boring, but when it was said, I just laughed because I had just came back from Los Angeles where I attended Tony Robbins Unleash the Power Within where you are pushed WAY out of your comfort zone in an arena of nearly 10k people, pushing past their limiting beliefs and Hawaii, where I met new people, tried new food, flew in a helicopter for the first time and since then I have been out of the country where I snorkeled in Punta Cana, swam with stingrays and sharks and just recently I went skydiving…to me, those are not things someone who is boring would do.. But then again “boring” is subjective, depending on the persons perspective. I know see, doing the same thing, being found at the same place weekend after weekend [my old life], is what I consider boring.

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What I have gained since getting sober 700 days ago:

1 • More time now that I am spending less time getting drunk or recovering from a hangover
2 • More money now that I am not buying beer every day and then spending my money foolishly while under the influence.
3 • I make better decisions
4 • My relationships with my family members have improved now that I am not always tired/irritable from recovering from a hangover and now that they get my full attention vs. alcohol getting my attention
5 • I take better care of myself and respect my body and have a sense of pride that I have never felt before

……..And I have met a TON of new people who are part of the sobriety community that inspires me daily and helps keep me accountable to my goal of staying sober. To join my private group, click on this link. 

If you are reading this we should definitely connect on Social Media – You can find me on Facebook, Instagram or YouTube

One book that has greatly helped me, that I recently was gifted by Sarah Ordo is Sober As F**K. I highly recommend it. Click here to order your copy.

 

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Surviving the Hurricane

I grew up in a sleepy little TEENY TINY coastal town in Northern California. I convinced myself that all there was to do there was “drink, do drugs, fuck, or fight” because it was such a small, boring town with nothing else to do.

I used to say that all the time. Isn’t it funny how self-absorbed we can be? We have beliefs that have been created by our own version of reality. We live by these belief systems and begin to believe our own BULLSHIT, while trying to convince others.

Whatever you believe comes true. Where you focus, energy flows. If you believe that all there is to do, is party, then you’ll never try to seek out any other options because you’ve convinced yourself that there isn’t any alternative.

In 2001, I moved to Texas. I moved to a town that was nearly 4 times the size of my hometown. Guess what everyone in this area believe? Most of the residents in our county will tell you that all there is to do is drink…….. because it’s a small boring town. Some will tell you it’s “just how things are done around here”. Talk to anyone who drinks frequently or has an unhealthy relationship with alcohol and they’ll tell you the same. I’ve met people who live in large cities who’ll tell you that all there is to do is drink.

When I moved to Texas, guess what? I gravitated towards the drinkers. That’s where I felt most at home. I was drunk at my first Texas wedding within the first week of my arrival & hit up my first club within the first month.

I was a partier, but after being a resident of Washington County, Texas for about a year, I have to say I was shocked at how much alcohol was consumed. There was alcohol served at every function and I mean EVERY function. Baby showers, baby’s baptisms, first communions, baby’s 1st birthday parties, you name it. It was “normal”.

Their “normal” became MY “normal”. You know how the saying goes, “If you can’t beat them, join them!”

This weekend we’re being held hostage in our house due to Hurricane Harvey. It’s predicted that our area is going to get about 20″ of rain. Houston and coastal towns like Rockport and Corpus Christi are getting hit HARD, by the heavy rain and high winds. [Keep Texas in your thoughts.].

I saw this on Facebook & I couldn’t help but think about the only 2 “Hurricane weekends” I’ve been through.

Growing up in California, there wasn’t any risk of tornadoes or hurricanes. In 2005 and 2008 I remember tropical storms that potentially threatened our area. My old employer was TERRIFIED of bad weather, so I always got time off whenever the weather seemed the least bit threatening. I remember those two “Hurricane Weekends”. All we did was PARTY for 3-4 days straight at friends. I remember in 2005 sitting outside getting wasted with a bunch of people, then hoping in a friends Winnebago and continuing drinking as we toured the county, with our kids. I remember in 2008, drinking all morning, afternoon and into the night for 3 days and playing wii at a friends house. I can’t remember any conversation that took place over those 2 weekends and don’t even hang out with any of those people anymore.

Hurricanes were just another reason to get wasted. I didn’t think about how thankful I was to be alive. I didn’t ever feel grateful for the fact that my boss paid me during those times he let me off because he wanted to make sure I was with my family and stayed safe. I didn’t think about how the Hurricanes could have came through our town and how unprepared we’d have been and unable to make the best decisions while intoxicated.

But now 671 days sober, I can sit back and reflect on how incredibly lucky I was to have never been harmed, or arrested during my irresponsible moments, that were all fueled by alcohol.

The one thing that sobriety has brought into my life is a greater sense of GRATITUDE & a higher level of self-awareness.

What is your definition of alcoholism and sobriety?

Over the summer, I made the decision to finally write a book, about my life. No sooner, did I set my intentions and shout it out to the universe, I won the book Sober As Fuck from Sarah Ordo on an Instagram contest. It was my first book I read on sobriety which inspired me even more. I highly recommend it. Once I started it, I couldn’t put it down.

To order click here:
http://amzn.to/2wcthgG

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It is so funny how similar all of our stories are, yet how incredibly different they are, as well as our journey towards sobriety. It looks different and feels different for everyone.

My life has been full of struggle, some out of my control that began before I was even born, when I was a child and had no control and in my adult-life, caused by my self-destructive, self-sabotaging behavior. 

My struggles and pain weren’t for nothing. They have become my gift. I share my story openly, in attempts to hold myself accountable while helping others, who feel alone with their own struggles.

My book is still in phase I. I will be sharing my story and life of addiction and sobriety journey, but I also want to include data, collected from others in the Sober Community.

I’d love for you to help me in collecting data, by filling out this form. (It is 100% anonymous, but feel free to reach out to me, if you’d like to share your story or network with me for extra support. Whether you are already on your own path to sobriety or are sober-curious, I’d love to hear from you.) Click on this link to complete the survey.

There is nothing sexy about a drunk girl!

When did you start drinking??
I grew up with parents & grandparents who had a liquor cabinet. I grew up in the “wine country”. My grandpa brewed his own beer. My family had wine or a “high-ball” often at dinner. Both of my grandmothers drank heavily. My Papa didn’t drink, he’d quit when my mother was still a young child.

Looking back, there was always alcohol present, but honestly, I don’t feel like it negatively impacted me or influenced my decision to start drinking at an extremely young age. I remember taking sips of my dad and grandpas beer. I always liked beer.

I started drinking recreationally at age 15 when I left home. I drank to be cool. I drank because I thought it impressed guys. Looking at the pictures I can truly say, there is nothing sexy about a sloppy drunk. I learned to drink because it gave me fake-confidence and it helped keep my mind off the things that ate at my soul. I quit drinking with all 3 pregnancies, but before each pregnancy was partying pretty hard, so by the time I found out I was pregnant each time (around 5-7 weeks), there had already been several weekends that I knew I had been drunk before I even knew I was pregnant. I remember not being able to wait to drink again. As the years went by, my drinking became heavier and more frequent.

Going clockwise, these pictures are:

• 1998 (17 years old)
• 2006 (26 years old)
• 2013 & 2014 (33 years old; passed out in the truck next to Rebel, something I once saw another mother do when I first moved to Texas and thought was absolutely horrific. And passed out mid-day on a vacation, tubing with old friends and family)
• 2015 the last day I drank Grey Goose from 5 pm until 2 am that day & only remember the first couple hours
• July 14, 2017 – 628 days sober 

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…. you may have followed my story on Instagram or Facebook & read my posts and think that you don’t have a problem, which not everyone does. Everyone has a different relationship with alcohol… BUT I know for me, what started off rather innocently, “for fun”, over time ended up being a big problem.

Have you ever stepped back and re-evaluated the things in your life that “you’ve always done” or done for years??

My transformation began with fitness, then a desire to be physically healthy, which together made me start to want to be stronger and healthier mentally, which is what led to my decision to get sober. Isn’t it funny how a single decision can start a domino effect in your life, either negatively or positively??

At any point in time, you can change the course of your life, with one single decision.

Sending all my love to all my sober family. I was so shocked and am now so appreciative of just how big and supportive the community is. And I’m so thankful for the fitness community that has helped me through all of this the past 18+ months. Support is everything when you’re trying to make a change. I have a private support group open to anyone who is looking for guidance, support, and help along the way. Click on this link to request to join. 

Staying Sober in NOLA

When I started blogging in 2013, I had no idea what I was doing. I started blogging about my new career that got started when I started my own health & fitness journey in 2012. I blogged fairly regularly and then pretty much stopped in 2015, when my life TOTALLY & COMPLETELY fell apart. I decided to get sober on October 25, 2015 and I am not sure why, but I never thought to blog about it. I have openly shared my journey on Facebook, YouTube and Instagram, but never blogged about it. Looking back, I wish I had of. It would have been nice to be able to look back and read my thoughts and feelings each day. So I feel like, starting a blog dedicated to my sobriety journey NOW, 18+ months in, is like moving backward. But, it’s better to start NOW than never, right?

Last week, I traveled to New Orleans, Louisiana for an annual event that I have been attending since 2013, that is hosted by the company that I have been with since early 2012. These events used to be an excuse to PARTY. The party began days before we’d even leave. I’d go into “vaca-mode” aka “party-mode” 2 days before every event.

Last year, the event was in Nashville, Tennessee. I was 9 months sober. I had already made it through 1 major trip surrounded by alcohol and our reminders of our old lifestyle and passed with flying colors, so I wasn’t too concerned about falling off the wagon. We had rented a house, which was far removed from downtown Nashville and brought our son Rebel so the temptation to drink was decreased. On that particular trip, some of our friends and houseguests chose to drink and the drama that I witnessed because of it was a great reminder as to why I quit drinking.

This year was different. This year I was in New Orleans, which used to be my FAVORITE party city. It is a city where anything goes. It is one place where I could go where no one knew me and anything is acceptable. I knew I wouldn’t fall off the wagon. I remain committed to my sobriety. I had Rebel and my step-daughter Hailey with me & I was there with my support system. But being in that city brought back so many old memories and familiar feelings. As the days go by, it’s easier to stay committed to this journey, but at the same time, as the days go on, my mind starts playing tricks on me. Part of me fantasizes about being able to party again. Part of me wonders if enough time has passed. Part of me wonders if I have healed enough to have a healthy relationship with alcohol. Part of me wants to “feel normal”. But then the other part of me reminds myself that I have come so far and haven’t needed a drink to celebrate or cope in 18+ months that has been full of exciting, happy, sad and stressful moments. I have made it this far without alcohol and my life is better because of it. At the end of every gut-check moment, I remain steadfast to my commitment, but the internal conflict is at times, draining.

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I shared some of my feelings LIVE on my 628th day of my journey.

Today, the kids and I went to the movies to see the movie Girls Trip, which the whole entire movie takes place in New Orleans. Rebel loved seeing all of the places that we had just seen days ago that were so familiar (The Convention Center, The Mercedes-Benz Super Dome and some of the streets we had walked down together).

The movie was HILARIOUS (if you have a dirty sense of humor), but it seemed like the whole movie was based on getting “turnt up”, bar-hopping and boozing it up because that is WHAT you are EXPECTED to do on a “Girls Trip”. You never really notice these things until you become sober. It is very apparent that alcohol is publicized at an all-time high on TV and in movies. Alcohol is more predominant now, than it was 15 years ago. Alcoholism is normally and so ally acceptable, which makes it a hard addiction to beat, because it’s legal and EVERYWHERE.

Sober is the New Black

My name is Mindy. I started my first blog in 2013. I didn’t know what I was doing then and to be quite honest, I still don’t feel like I know what I am doing. The more I blogged, the more the words that had been trapped in my head flowed. The words began to flow more freely. As time went by, I became more comfortable with sharing my story, my life, my struggles, my insecurities, my dirty past.

As I shared more about my life and the self-discoveries I made on my path to become a better version of myself and heal, I was shocked at how many people reached out to me with similar stories, thanking me for sharing my truths.

Over the years many have suggested that I should write a book. I shrugged it off, every time it was brought up. Why? I didn’t feel qualified to write a book. I didn’t think anyone would read it. I didn’t know where to even start. I was scared & still am [terrified] about putting ALL of my life out ALL at once, for the world to judge me, for my kids to read.

I recently have taken the time to get clear and become specific about what I want for my future and what I want to accomplish in this lifetime. It became clear that I wanted to work towards becoming a motivational speaker, life coach, and author.

Once I put my vision on paper, the Universe started showing up and pointing me in the direction of my dreams.

I have been paralyzed with fear. Is it possible to have writer’s block before you even get started writing a book?

I post frequently (daily) on Social Media (IG: @Sobermommovement & Facebook: Mindy Hord),  but I haven’t blogged in awhile, so I decided to get back in the swing of things. I decided to start a new blog, which will also serve as a place to connect with others who have been inspired by my journey towards sobriety and those who are looking for inspiration & support. I have given myself a 9-month deadline to get my first draft written. My book will be primarily about my journey to sobriety that began on October 25, 2015, but you will learn more about me and my life as a Korean Adoptee and my quest to become a better version of myself that prompted me to get sober.

If you are on your journey towards sobriety and looking for support or are looking for help in getting sober, please do not hesitate to reach out to me via email or social media.

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